A grumpy monotone voice comes from the backseat,
a snappy comment to his brother.
Hush…
Not even halfway there,
another abrasive comment.
Shush… don’t be so mean!
A day that feels like a year later,
he hops back into the car,
no words at all.
Then, without warning,
like lightening in a heat storm
he strikes, words searing hot.
What is wrong with you? What’s going on?
Noth.ing.
He escapes the car, stomps down the driveway.
I’m going to the lake.
I know he has homework,
but I say,
Ok. Love you.
And I worry.
Hours and a soccer practice later,
he gets back in the car,
and begins with cutting words again.
What happened?
He says nothing,
escaping into a digital world.
This isn’t like him.
But I remind myself that,
on the cusp of adulthood,
he might not even know why he feels what he feels.
He throws an empty water bottle across the garage, and seethes,
This world SUCKS,
and I’m gonna change it.
Muffled voices through the wall…
A monotone and aloof young man’s voice
that cracks with the concerns of a child,
and an adult voice filled with the complexities of
someone who knows frustration and aggression,
and disappointment…
a father who wants to comfort and advise,
a man who loves his son.
His father discloses to me,
He’s frustrated that his team lost
and he’s concerned about his math class
but mostly,
he’s upset about the dolphins that get caught in the nets,
and Animal Planet is doing a special on it tonight.
Then, he smiles.
And I do, too.
Those things that lie on the surface,
the ones that he thinks he should be concerned with,
don’t really bother him at all.
It’s those things that really matter,
those things that he can’t yet wrap his ocean-sized heart around,
that bring forth tsunami waves of emotion.
God, thank-you for this child of mine
who loves all your creatures,
who helps his friends,
protects the young,
defends the defenseless…
Thank-you for this young man who, I have no doubt,
will change the world.
****
Sharing this gift of mine with Emily at:
And my sweet shot of that little skink (the blue one, not my son!) with Darcy at:
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